Real Community.

There's a lot of talk of community these days, especially in the church.  And I think everyone loves the idea of community, but a lot of us either shrink back from it or don't completely get it.


Human beings are frustrating; I don't want to "do life" with them.

They're secretly judging me, anyway.  

Who knows what they're really thinking of me??

My church (or my school, or my homeschool group, or my workplace) is filled with some people that I can't stand; I don't want to get involved and in close quarters with them.

I'm an introvert; I don't want to be in community.


Ouch.  Have you ever found yourself feeling this way?


Community is something I've struggled with for a while.  I honestly dreaded getting up and going to church on Sunday morning, because once I got there, I felt out of place, irritated, and self-conscious.  In other places, I felt awkward.  And everywhere, I was frustrated and somewhat intimidated by people, and I shrank from being with them.  I started realizing that it was more than personality types, introversion and extroversion; it was me being critical, a bit cynical, and unwilling to love and be patient.  And as I looked back at Jesus, our prime example, I realized that community was something He did very well.  Jesus spent time with all kinds of people, from the Pharisees, to the prostitutes and tax collectors, to the average in-between people.  He didn't divide up His time, making sure not to mix the different kinds of people He spent time with.  No, He brought them all together and taught and loved them together.  He encouraged them to love one another.  He was never secretly judgmental.  He didn't scorn people when they failed.  And He called us, His church, to nurture that same kind of loving community in every area of our own lives, particularly seeking Him with other believers (but loving our enemies and those who persecute us, too).

I have friends that talk about Jesus' kind of community a lot.  And I've always loved the idea of it--it's
inspiring, and beautiful, and something I desire--but for so long I just couldn't seem to replicate it or carry it into my own life.  My constant excuse was, there aren't any people around here that love God enough for me to be in that kind of community with.  Everyone here is judgmental.  I always feel so awkward with all the people here.  All these people are so annoying and fake.  


But how prideful and unlike Jesus is that?  Because no, darkness has no fellowship with light (2 Corinthians 6:14), but yes, we are the salt and light of the world, followers of the greater light, Jesus, who spent His time with the sick, because they were the ones that needed a doctor.

But He didn't just leave the goody-two-shoes Pharisees in the dust of His sandals, either.  He taught and loved and spoke with them just the same.  Two completely different kinds of people, the lost sinner and the hypocritical religious leader, and Jesus pulled them together in His company with love and wisdom and truth.  Whether they stayed was their business, but His arms were always open.  This is what true community looks like.  Jesus didn't pick who He wanted to love and be in community with.  He didn't step back to ask if they were worthy or not.  Because actually, honestly, none of us were.  But He chose to do it anyway.  To put it as I've heard it said lately: unconditional love is completely irrational.  But aren't we glad that Jesus was irrational?  And I would also add that unconditional love is completely inconvenient....but inconvenience is something Jesus was willing to take on in loving us.


Somehow, though, I think the idea of community has been skewed a wee bit at times.  Because sometimes, community becomes about our friends, and especially as young people, it starts to become about how many friends we have, and who those friends are, and what kind of group that puts us in, and if we spend all our time doing fun things with our friends, and if it makes us look like we have the funnest, most friend-filled life ever to those on the outside.  It becomes about appearances and how many friends we have in our little communities, and who those friends are, and how much time we spend with our friends, because that is what society judges us by.  I'm sure you know what I'm talking about.  It's the people who will literally tell you that they have this many friends or that many friends, and then they have these people who are their best friends, and they do all these fun things together, and they go and shout it out on all of social media--and it can all leave those outside that circle of friends feeling excluded and less than.  It can leave you wondering if you actually are worth anything, or if your life is fun enough, or good enough, if you don't have lots of friends to go out and do stuff with.

But I feel like real community is less about friends and more about family.  Not literal family, really.  But it's more like family.  Because anybody--you, me, the kid who doesn't have any friends--can go out and be a fake version of themselves for a little while and gain "friends."  People are willing to accept you if you act the way you want them to.  But family is something different.  It's unconditional.  It's strong and deeply-rooted.  Our family members can absolutely drive us up the wall and we can be at each others' throats, but we never really stop loving each other.  Friendships break down sometimes.  Friends can give up on each other--and I guess family can, too, but there's such a stronger bond there.  The Trinity is even described in a familial way--the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit.  We are called children of God.  We are co-heirs (essentially, brothers and sisters) with Jesus.  That's a very strong picture of God's love for us, and how He wants our community with others to be.  He loves us with the ferocity and faithfulness that a father has for his children.  I'm not a parent yet, and I know I really don't have an inkling of what the strength of a parent's love really is....but I can imagine.  I can listen and observe parents around me, my parents especially, and I can get an idea.  That kind of love is something, for sure, and yet it's only a reflection of how perfect the Father's love is for us.  I mean, He literally IS love.  He's our Heavenly Father, we're His children.  All of us.

"So in Christ Jesus you are all children of God through faith, for all of you who were baptized into Christ have clothed yourselves with Christ.  There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male or female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus.  If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham's seed, and heirs according to the promise."

-Galatians 3:26-29

And in a close family, you can be yourself without fear or pretense.  When you're at home with them, you can simply be your absolute self, relaxed, knowing that you're loved and accepted as you are, with no walls or guards put up, no pretending.  This is the kind of community our Father intended for us.  There's no fear of secret judgment or what those around you are really thinking.  No one is talking about someone behind their back, scorning or ridiculing them.

"A dishonest man spreads strife, and a whisperer separates close friends."

-Proverbs 16:28

You can speak freely, honestly.  It may be painful sometimes, and yes, you may be scared to bring faults, shortcomings, and hurts out into the light at times, but you know that to keep that close family, you have to be vulnerable and open with each other.  You're not perfect and you don't expect others to be, but you do your best, and you try to have patience with them when they fall.  Where one of you drops the ball, the others pick up the slack.  It's beautiful.

"Therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed.  The earnest prayer of a righteous person has great power and produces wonderful results."

-James 5:16

And even as I type this, I feel like such a hypocrite, because I fail at this daily.  Sometimes I avoid people and I try to keep certain people out and I don't serve or love well at all.  But I'm trying.  I'm trying so hard.  I've seen a lot of fakeness in my life, and I'm tired of it.  I've seen a lot of people talking behind other people's back, and I don't want to replicate that pattern.  I want to be real.  I want to be genuine.  I want to be honest.  And I have to say, I haven't been a part of very many circles or communities where that's a consistent reality.  And this has been on my mind for a while now, just tumbling around.  This past Friday, I got to be a part of something a little like that.  It was kind of like God was poking me and going, "There's some experience to back up that idea of what a real community looks like that's been brewing in your head, Joy."  I was at a swing dance and the power went out--no lights, no AC, no music.  Cell phone lights went on and a couple of people began to sing the lyrics to an old swing song as others backed them up with vocal saxophones and basses and everyone clapped the beat.  Some people left, but most stayed, and we gathered into a circle and kept singing and clapping and dancing while everything was bathed in those white cell phone lights, looking like a scene out of a black and white movie.

 And the beauty of it all was that everyone was together--old, young, black, white, new and familiar with the dance, from all areas, seasons, and walks of life--sharing the joy of the music and the dance, and everyone was singing.  You didn't feel as if you were a bother.  There was no competition.  No one felt like they were secretly being made fun of if they weren't the best at singing, or if they lost the beat, or if they messed up in some way.  Where one person dropped the ball on the lyrics of a song, others would pick it up and carry it through until everyone could join in again.  Some people picked up papers and began to fan others around them, something that I now realize was a beautiful picture of serving others.  It was something so small and spontaneous, but as I pondered on it all later, I realized that that's just what real community looks like.


It looks like family.

"Being a family means you are part of something wonderful.  It means you will love and be loved for the rest of your life.  No matter what."

-Lisa Weedn

---It looks like not having to put up walls, be fake, or pretend like everything is okay.

---It looks like not having to compete, because everyone knows that they're accepted just as they are, with all their quirks and oddities--and that ultimately, we're accepted by God, the only one that matters.  We're working from acceptance and not for it.  That's a freeing knowledge in itself, because when we're not in a place where we have to try to assure ourselves of our own worth and acceptance, we're able to affirm others and love them selflessly.

---It looks like being honest and real with each other, in all aspects of life.

---It looks not like a little huddle of friends with inside jokes and exclusivity, but rather like a big family with arms open wide to readily welcome others into the love.

---It looks like there being no fear that we'll lose our friends over something we do or say, or who we really are, because like Jesus' love, family is unconditional.  That's how community is supposed to be.

Most of all, it looks like clothing ourselves with "tenderhearted mercy, kindness, humility, gentleness, and patience."  (Colossians 3:v.12)  It looks like making allowance for each others' faults, and forgiving anyone who offends us, and most of all, it looks like putting on love over all those things, because love binds us all together in perfect harmony (v. 13-14).  It looks like loving and serving the same way Jesus did.  Stop for a moment with me and think about what that looks like in your own life.  We usually don't have to work at showing tenderhearted mercy for those awesome people in our lives that make us happy--no, it's the ones that drive us crazy and hurt us and misunderstand us and get under our skin.  And sadly enough, those people are so often those right under our noses.  You know the ones I'm talking about.  Living this kind of life requires a total revamping of our minds and the way we think, react, and treat others, because loving like Jesus means not competing with others, not having secret motives, not trying to get ahead--even with those that have ulterior motives against us and whom we know to be attention-seekers, hypocrites, and manipulative.  Jesus washed Judas' feet.  It means putting others' needs and wants before our own, and putting our own desires and comforts last.

"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit.  Rather, in humility value others above yourselves, not looking to our own interests but each of you to the interests of the others.  In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Christ Jesus: Who, being in very nature God, did not consider eqality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.  And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death--even death on a cross!"

-Philippians 2:3-8

It means being compassionate, sharing in both the sufferings and the joys of others.  

Compassion, n.

A suffering with another.

It means being sincere and having empathy; genuinely caring about what's going on in others' life (because that is the manifestation of "not looking to our own interests, but to the interests of others).  Practically, it means making that phone call or sending that text to check on what's going in that person's life.  It means taking the time to step out and invite someone into the circle.  It means stopping and thinking about what's going on in their life and what effect that might be having on them--and how you can love them right in the middle of that.  It means taking an interest in every single part of someone's life, because that's one of the most encouraging things you can do.  It plainly says, "I love you.  I care about you.  You're worth it."


"Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ."
-Galatians 6:2


This is what real community truly looks like.  And yes, it takes a renewing of our minds to think and live life like this.  It takes work and it takes practice and it takes a whole lot of spending time with God and soaking in His truth, but it's beautiful when it takes action in our lives and in the lives of those we touch.  I guess this is my hope for my life; that I'd stop putting up walls and pretending; that I'd stop competing with others; that I'd stop making secret snap judgments in my mind; that I'd stop being exclusive and start reaching out and welcoming people, all kinds of people, with the Jesus kind of love that is both unconditional and always serving.  And I hope we'll all do it together.  Because that's what real community is--inspired by Jesus--and when that becomes a reality, God starts doing awesome things in and through us.  That's what I want in my life.


"So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other.  Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.  Your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples."
-John 13:35

Faithful Fridays: Why Last Friday Was the Last.

I started Faithful Fridays in 2009, when my blog was just a newborn and I used about 60 exclamation points in each post.  :)  At the end of last week I posted my last Faithful Fridays post.  I wanted to let you guys know why.

It's not because....

I'm giving up on it.

(I'm no quitter.)

Or....

I don't want to hear about you guys and your walk with Jesus.

(Of course I do; that's the community of blogging!)

It's also not because....

I don't want to talk about Jesus and how I'm doing life with Him on my blog.

(That will always be pretty much the biggest topic on my blog, because Jesus is the biggest thing in my life.)

The basic reason is that I feel like I can bring more to my blog without keeping up with a link-up.  I want to bring my blog back to a place of simplicity.  I've never worked at my best under a time limit or schedule (that, my writing friends, is why I failed at NaNoWriMo).  I'm always late.  And sometimes, having to keep up with writing a certain thing at a certain time can make my blog feel like a chore, and I don't want that to happen.  I want my posts to flow out of a creative place, so that they can be enjoyable both to you and to me, not frantic and hurried each week.

So I hope that as I bring Faithful Fridays to a close, for now at least (who knows what could happen down the road), you all are understanding, and you won't stop coming to visit and read and share here as I embark on a new season on my blog.  I'm so thankful for all of you who have faithfully participated over the years I've been doing Faithful Fridays...it means a lot, and I'm so glad to have "met" you all!  :)

God bless and much love,

Joy :)

Faithful Fridays ~ If You Must Look Forward, Do So Prayerfully.

Good afternoon!  :)  I'm back from a wee break and ready to share something with you guys that I've been learning lately.  :)

Faithful Fridays is a weekly linky party hosted on my blog. I made it so that Christians could have one special day out of the week (Friday) to share something from their walk with Jesus on their blog. If you'd like to participate, write your post, grab the button from the Faithful Fridays page on my blog (so that it will link back here), and come link up at the bottom of this post! :)

*****************************************************

"If you must look back, do so forgivingly.  If you must look forward, do so prayerfully.  But the best thing you can do is to be present in the present...gratefully."

-Maya Angelou

I've always classified myself as a worrier.  I think a lot, and a lot of that thinking involves thinking about the future--fantasizing, dreaming, or worrying, depending on the subject.  It's just my default mode, and I think a lot of people are the same way.  It seems to be in our programming; we want to know what's next, and when, and how it's all going to play out (okay, maybe a part of that is a woman's curse ;)).  So we spend time mulling over the future and all its unknown details.  And so many times, that leads us into worry.  Which is really just a lack of trust in God; a lack of faith.  

"Do not be anxious about anything, but in every situation, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God."

-Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything.  

That's a command, and it's a pretty crazy one, isn't it?  

Do not be anxious about anything.

Not your health, or your job, or your career, or your dreams, or your future husband, or your friendships, or your relationship with God, or if people will like you, or how good or strong of a person you are.  

Instead, in every situation, by prayer and petition (or supplication, the kind of prayers where we let God know what we need), with thanksgiving, present your requests to God.

"Worry implies that we don't quite trust that God is big enough, powerful enough, or loving enough."

-Francis Chan

It's not that we aren't supposed to think about the future at all.  In fact, over and over again, we're told to keep our mind's eye fixed on Jesus' return, and our homecoming to Heaven, where our lasting citizenship lies.  But it's how we look at the future that matters.  Do we look at it through the lens of trying to figure out what's going to happen and how we're going to handle it?  Do we look at it with the thought of, "Well just in case God decides not to act, I will....."?

"And without faith it is impossible to please God, because anyone who comes to Him must believe that He exists and that He rewards those who earnestly seek Him."

-Hebrews 11:6

That is how worry and anxiety come to fill up our souls, to take over our minds and make our lives miserable.  The key to living without fear of the future, to look forward and still battle away worry and anxiety, is to look forward prayerfully.  Not living it out in our heads in our own strength, or over-planning, but by praying.  By bringing that issue that's nagging at our minds, however big, small, strange, terrifying, or petty it may be, straight up to God.  Laying it at His feet in trust.  Because you see, He is sovereign.  Omnipresent.  Always there, everywhere, eternally and completely in control.  He truly has the whole world in His hands.  Whatever is happening or could happen to you is not a surprise to Him--He doesn't come rushing onto the scene afterward to do damage control and clean up.  His hand is on it all; and it's not your response or ability to circumstances that matters, but your response to His ability.  He cares enough about you to not want you to live your life in anxiety or fear, and He's waiting on you to give those things to Him in trust.

Prayerful looking forward is when we start to feel ourselves stressing out over our next grade, our college choices, that one relationship that is on shaky ground, or even our distant future life choices--and we choose to turn our minds instead to God's perfect sovereignty and love for us.  

"We know how much God loves us, and we have put our trust in his love.  ...Such love has no fear, because perfect love expels all fear.  If we are afraid, it is for fear of punishment, and this shows that we have not fully experienced his perfect love."

-1 John 4:16 & 18

Whatever it is in the future--or the present--that strikes fear and anxiety into your mind, bring it to your Father, the one who created, loved, and paid the price for you to live entirely in Him and His life of freedom.  Look forward prayerfully, with thanksgiving, too--thanksgiving went before God's miracles so many times in Jesus' walk on earth, so thank God in remembrance for what He's already done and in anticipation of what He will do.  Look forward prayerfully and do not be anxious about anything--He's waiting to take those burdens from you.  

"For the word of the Lord holds true, and we can trust everything he does.  He loves whatever is just and good; the unfailing love of the Lord fills the earth.

-Psalm 33:4-5

**************************

This is my last Faithful Friday post--more explaining about that to come soon!  I want to bring my blog back to a place where I simply spill out my thoughts and what happens in my life, unconfined by a certain time (I'm always late :)) or name.  Don't worry, though, the content of Faithful Fridays--sharing what I and others learn in our personal relationships and walks with Jesus with one another--is something I definitely want to keep up through blogging, and I won't stop sharing those things here!  :)

Have a lovely week and God bless you guys,

Joy :)

Faithful Fridays ~ Servant.

Good afternoon, and happy Friday!  :)



Faithful Fridays is a weekly linky party hosted on my blog. I made it so that Christians could have one special day out of the week (Friday) to share something from their walk with Jesus on their blog. If you'd like to participate, write your post, grab the button from the Faithful Fridays page on my blog (so that it will link back here), and come link up at the bottom of this post! :)

********
"For even the Son of Man did not come to be served, but to serve, and to give his life as a ransom for many." -Mark 10:45


Have you ever stopped and thought about that?  Really thought about it?  It's dawned on me afresh lately just how humble Jesus was, just how much of a servant He made Himself in love.  Can you imagine?  God, coming down to the lowness of earth--the very lowest--and living out a very average human life--up until the last three years--in preparation for a horrible death.  And for what?  A world full of people who had turned from Him and would ignore, insult, deny, betray, bash, doubt, ridicule, scorn, beat, and eventually kill Him.  
And yet somehow, He loved them.  Marvelously.  Ferociously.  Sacrificially.  Genuinely.  His love is the kind of love you can take to the bank.  

"In your relationships with one another, have the same mindset as Jesus Christ:
Who, being in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be used to his own advantage; rather, he made himself nothing by taking the very nature of a servant, being made in human likeness.  And being found in appearance as a man, he humbled himself by becoming obedient to death--even death on a cross!  
Therefore God exalted him to the highest place and gave him the name that is above every name, that at the name of Jesus every knee should bow, in heaven on earth and under the earth, and every tongue acknowledge that Jesus Christ is Lord, to the glory of God the Father." -Philippians 2:5-11



The Bible says that Jesus is basically the glue of everything in the world.  He is sustaining all things by his powerful word (Heberews 1:3).  He is the image of the inviible God, the firstborn over all creation (Colossians 1:15).  In Him and for Him, all things were created, in heaven and earth, visible and invisible.  He is before all things, and in Him, all things hold together (Colossians 1:16-17).  Not to mention that He's the head of the church, the glorious groom that's coming for His bride, the church, with a major celebration to follow (Colossians 1:18).  To put it plainly, in everything, He has supremacy (Colossians 1:18).  

So Jesus is a pretty big deal, right?  

And yet at the supper table he takes on the position and the appearance of a servant, a common slave.  He kneels at the feet of every disciple and washes their dirty, dusty [man] feet.  

And here's the clincher: Jesus washed Judas' feet.  

Wham.  

I'm not sure why that never dawned on me before.  Perhaps I've heard the story so much that I've become numb to it.  But He knew.  He knew Judas.  The Bible tells us that God knows the heart, or "always knows a person's thoughts" (Acts 15:8).  Jesus knew full well that Judas had been sneaking money out of the money bag (John 12:6).  And He knew full well that Judas would be the one of His close group of followers that would betray Him with a kiss--a kiss that would lead to His death.

And yet He got down on His knees and washed Judas' feet, the perfect picture of humility, kneeling at the feet of, and loving, the man who was technically His enemy.  

"'A new command I give you: Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another." -John 13:34

We all have enemies.  Not in the sense of them betraying us to death, of course.  But they're the ones that are always bringing us down.  Dragging us into the dirt.  Always making us feel insecure.  Always one-upping us.  Always getting under our skin.  Always ruining our days.  Always bringing out our worst sides.  
Thing is, Jesus loved those people.  He bled and died for them.  The lips that gave His kiss of betrayal were created by Jesus Himself.  The hands that arrested Him, dragged Him into interrogation, flogged Him, and nailed Him onto a cross were created and sustained and powered by Him.  He could have stopped it all at any time; called down armies of angels to slay all His attackers (Matthew 26:53).  But instead, He allowed it all to happen for a greater cause, because He. Loved. Them.  And He calls us to come follow Him and love the same kind of people in the same way--truly, genuinely, humbly, with the kind of love you can bank on.  
It's rough.  It's not the natural response to that kind of person, nor is it the easiest.  But that's what Jesus did, and if we're choosing to follow Him, we have no choice than to do otherwise.  
So today I dare you--no, to clarify, I dare myself--to try it, to have Jesus' mindset in our relationships with others.  You know the person (or people) I'm talking about, the one that makes you want to turn your head and walk away, or maybe on the flip side, walk over and smack them in the face; or maybe they just make you want to throw a fit and go hide in your bedroom.  We're humans; we do that.  But Jesus was a man, too, and He chose to love those kinds of people.  I want to have that same mindset in my relationships with others.  I want to follow His lead.  

Faithful Fridays ~ {Psalm 42}

Happy Friday, everyone!  :)  My apologies for disappearing on you last Friday--we were getting ready to head out of town to see my aunt, who is doing much, much better.  She's walking (without a walker) and talking, and slowly getting better.  We all appreciate your prayers so, so much, once again!  :)







Faithful Fridays is a weekly linky party hosted on my blog. I made it so that Christians could have one special day out of the week (Friday) to share something from their walk with Jesus on their blog. If you'd like to participate, write your post, grab the button from the Faithful Fridays page on my blog (so that it will link back here), and come link up at the bottom of this post! :)


*****************************************************************************************************


I wanted to share a chapter of the Bible with you guys that has made an impression on me--it's something I bring to mind often when I'm facing something tough.  I was reading it in my NIV/Message side-by-side translation Bible and the Message version just really stuck with me.



A white-tailed deer drinks from the creek; I want to drink God, deep draughts of God.  I'm thirsty for God-alive.  I wonder, 'Will I ever make it--arrive and drink in God's presence?'  I'm on a diet of tears--tears for breakfast, tears for supper.  All day long people knock at my door, pestering , 'Where is this God of yours?'


These are the things I go over and over, emptying out the pockets of my life.  I was always at the head of the worshiping crowd, right out in front, leading them all, eager to arrive and worship, shouting praises, singing thanksgiving--celebrating, all of us, God's feast!



Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul?  Why are you crying the blues?  Fix my eyes on God-soon I'll be praising again.  He puts a smile on my face. He's my God.  



When my soul is in the dumps, I rehearse everything I know of you, from Jordan depths to Hermon heights, including Mount Mizar.  Chaos calls to chaos, to the tune of whitewater rapids.  Your breaking surf, your thundering breakers crash and crush me.  Then God promises to love me all day, sing songs all through the night!  My life is God's prayer.


Sometimes I ask God, my rock-solid God, 'Why did you let me down?  Why am I walking around in tears, harassed by enemies?'  They're out for the kill, these tormentors with their obscenities, taunting day after day, 'Where is this God of yours?'


Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul?  Why are you crying the blues?  Fix my eyes on God--soon I'll be praising again.  He puts a smile on my face.  He's my God." -Psalm 42


This psalmist knew trouble, you guys.  He knew what it was like to feel abandoned God, to feel like God was either not present or remaining silent.  He knew what it was to long for God; for His action, His presence, His comfort.  He knew what it was to be tormented by voices that taunted him, asking where his God was in that time of trouble.  


And in the midst of all that, he reminded himself of God.  He rehearsed everything he knew of God, all he had seen Him do, all God had done in his life.  He rehearsed what he knew of the power of God; His majestic creation, the heavens that proclaimed the glory of God.  He rehearsed the ups and downs of his life, and how God had opened up doors and led him through the seasons.  


And he finished it all with a reminder once again--"Why are you down in the dumps, dear soul?  Why are you crying the blues?  Fix my eyes on God--soon I'll be praising again.  He puts a smile on my face.  He's my God."


He rehearsed everything he knew of God, reminded himself of why he could trust Him, and then he took up his song of faith, his song of joy in the Lord, and he made it through.  May we do the same.

Faithful Fridays ~ When You Doubt.

Hey there, and Happy Friday!  :)  I sort of took an unannounced break from Faithful Fridays last week--time got away from me and then I wasn't feeling well for the last part of the weekend.  BUT!  I have good news.  I've been keeping you guys updated on my aunt's progress after the stroke she had several weeks ago--it's been a bumpy road, but tons of prayers have been going up for my aunt Missy, and God's definitely shown up.  She's back home now (since last Monday) from the hospital, and we're hoping she'll really improve from this point on and stay on the healthy side.  Thank you so much for your prayers, and please keep them up!  :)



Faithful Fridays is a weekly linky party hosted on my blog. I made it so that Christians could have one special day out of the week (Friday) to share something from their walk with Jesus on their blog. If you'd like to participate, write your post, grab the button from the Faithful Fridays page on my blog (so that it will link back here), and come link up at the bottom of this post! :)


***********************************************************************************************
It's honesty time.  I'm going to share something with you guys that I haven't shared with very many people, because it's not a past struggle--it's a current one.  It's something I deal with every day, something very real and something very hard and it frustrates me more than anything. If you were to ask me what I struggle with the most in my faith, I'd say doubt.  Funny how faith and doubt are the exact opposite.   I think everyone doubts at some point, in some shape, form, or fashion--whether it be doubting God's plan, His wisdom, His love, or just God Himself. I doubt God's word; I doubt His love; I doubt His truthfulness; His goodness; even His realness.   For the longest time, if you would have asked me what my greatest fears were, I would say "losing my family and losing my faith."  Those are the two most important things in my life.  And sometimes this attacks on my faith would seize me--questions I couldn't answer, feelings that I couldn't shake, thoughts that I just wanted to push away, but which still hung around the back of my mind, tormenting me.   With Him, it is well with my soul.  But when my belief in Him begins to ebb away and uncertainty mars my thoughts, it's like a wall comes up in my relationship with God.   "If God loves you, why is He letting you face this?"

"Is God even there at all?"

"Isn't the thought of worshiping and following an invisible God crazy?  That somehow, someone who wasn't created Himself created everything by just His word?"

"Is following Jesus really worth it?"

"Did He really rise from the dead?  Were all those miracles He performed just some sort of trick?"

"Is God's word trustworthy?"

"Is everything I've believed and lived for all my life true?"
It's a crippling fear to have hanging over you.  I think some of it was caused by emotional stuff that messed with my head and left my mind weak--a perfect target for an attack of the enemy, don't you think?  And on the other hand, some of it was simply questions about my faith in God that needed to be answered.  My faith was being challenged by a world that hasn't accepted God, and I was letting the voices of those who don't know Him invade my own mind.   And it was hard.  I hadn't faced that before.  I'll be honest, in the past I was always that one person that has no problem believing--for whatever reason, I never doubted God.  And then all the sudden, there it is in front of me, a bucketful of doubts and questions dumped into my lap, unexpected, and I didn't know what to do with them or how to face them. And I didn't have answers for them.  I had no idea how to face them, or how to approach them. "Believers should acknowledge and wrestle with doubts.  It's no longer sufficient to hold beliefs just because you inherited them." -Tim Keller I'm a writer.  And a thinker.  And a deep person.  I think a lot.  I feel a lot.  And I'm also a very fear-prone person (read: a worry wart).  I tried pushing the doubts away; that doesn't work because it reminds me that I just don't have answers to all these questions.  So I found myself hashing over these doubts and these fears constantly, over and over in my mind.  It left me feeling depressed and alone and distant from God and everyone around me.  I got so wrapped up in my own head that I forgot to live life.  It left me feeling like a hypocrite when I talked about Jesus to other people.  I started becoming a cold, grey cynic.  Every time I went to pray or read God's word, the questions and doubting and confusion were magnified.  It's not a fun place to be.  It's hard to find peace and joy in God when He's the one you're doubting. And you know what that taught me?  It taught me that without God, I'm lost.  I wrestled a lot and finally came to the conclusion that life without God is not worth living.  Yeah, I want God.  More than anything.  I want to know Him, I want to have true intimacy with Him.  I want to follow Jesus, even if it is hard.  But the question still hung: how do I know it's all true?  How do I know that He really is there?  That He really loves me?  That I can really trust Him?  The fear still remained: I want God, but what if He's not really there?  What if He's not really who I think He is?  
There's this song that I love.  In fact, if you know me very well, you probably have heard me talk about it.  Or sing it.  Loudly.  It's "My Lighthouse" by Rend Collective.  The first time I ever heard this song was when they played it live.  I was waist-deep in doubt and fear, experiencing much of the questions for the first time, and this song spoke volumes, right from the first verse-- In my wrestling and in my doubts, In my failures, You won't walk out. Your great love will lead me through. You are the peace in my troubled sea, You are the peace in my troubled sea!

Wrestling and doubts?  That's a language I know well.  The song sort of slapped me in the face and made me realize, "Wow.  God just might be bigger than my doubts about Him.  He just might be able to work through them, in the midst of them." "God is not afraid of my doubt.  When I express it to Him, He doesn't flee from me and leave me in my confusion." -Warren Barfield Life goes on, and as I found answers to some of my questions--more arose.  It always amazes me when I lay my doubts and frustration and questions before God honestly, painfully and then go to His word--only to promptly find the answer.  It shouldn't, but it does, and it's just an amazing thing to experience--it brings peace.  But it's easy to let those answered questions and stilled doubts fall away to the sidelines and be forgotten when others arise.   I asked why He lets bad things happen if He's good.  Age-old question, I know, but it plagues everyone.  I was reminded that sin is the cause of most of the evil, the corruption in our world.  And I was reminded that "In this world you will have trouble"--Jesus never said we wouldn't--"but take heart.  I have overcome the world."  (John 16:33.)  Jesus said He said those things so that in HIM, we may have peace.   I cried out in frustration to God one day--"I can't see You!  And I'm supposed to just believe You?  How do I know that you aren't just pretend?  How do I know that all this stuff isn't just dressed up to look like You?  Why is it so hard for me to believe?" I cringed at laying all that out in the open honestly, but then I picked up reading in my Bible where I had last left off--only to come across the verse in 2 Corinthians 4 where it says "The god of this age has blinded the minds of unbelievers, so that they cannot see the light of the gospel that displays the glory Christ, who is the image of God." Bam.  Jesus is the mirror-image of the invisible God, the one we can't see.  He's the window through which we see the God that we can't see.  You want a clear picture of what your Creator is like?  Just look at Jesus.  The marvel of Jesus is that God made Himself human.  Visible.  Touchable.  Knowable.  Even those who aren't believers acknowledge that Jesus lived.  And I think we all can testify to the fact that that tomb was empty.  I would have loved to have been there when Jesus walked the earth, to look at this embodiment of God right in front of me.  As I've heard it put before, "We have a backstage pass to the father through Jesus Christ."   One day I was definitely in the midst of troubled seas--I couldn't seem to find peace of any sort, just complete turmoil.  So I grabbed my Bible, got alone, and wrote it out--God, You've got to give me peace.  I can't do this.  I flip open my Bible, turn a page or two, and my eyes fall on this passage just in Jeremiah 29:  "This is God's Word on the subject: 'As soon as Baylon's seventy years are up and not a day before, I'll show up and take care of you as I promised and bring you back home.  I know what I'm doing.  I have it all planned out--plans to take care of you, not abandon you, plans to give you the future you hope for.  When you call on me, when you come and pray to me, I'll listen.  When you come looking for me, you'll find me.  Yes, when you get serious about finding me and want it more than anything else, I'll make sure you won't be disappointed.'  God's decree.  'I'll turn things around for you.  I'll bring you back from all the countries into which I drove you'--God's decree--'bring you home to the place from which I sent you off into exile.  You can count on it." -Jeremiah 29:10-14 Peace came, in a way I'm not sure I've ever quite experienced it before. People doubted in the Bible.  In Judges 6 and 7, God approached Gideon with instructions for him to lead the lesser, weaker nation of Israel to overcome their enemies a battle.  Gideon was afraid, taken aback, and doubtful--Me?  Weak runt that I am?  How can you say that Your favor is on me?  Look around you!  Look at all this defeat!  Gideon laid out those fleeces, asking God to show Himself for sure.  And God did, despite Gideon's fear and doubt and weaknesses.  So Gideon trusted, he took God at His word, and he carried through God's instructions.  And you know what happened--surprise!--Israel won.   What's the point of all this?  In all this, I've learned.  I've learned that the only answer to trials and challenges of my faith is to turn and run closer to God, instead of turning a cold shoulder to Him in the pain.   "The key to joy is seeking God where we doubt He is." -Ann Voskamp

I learned to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus.  I love reading about when Jesus called Peter out to walk on the water with Him. "Shortly before dawn Jesus went out to them, walking on the lake. When the disciples saw him walking on the lake, they were terrified. 'It’s a ghost,' they said, and cried out in fear. But Jesus immediately said to them: 'Take courage! It is I. Don’t be afraid.' 'Lord, if it’s you,' Peter replied, 'tell me to come to you on the water.' 'Come,' he said. Then Peter got down out of the boat, walked on the water and came toward Jesus. But when he saw the wind, he was afraid and, beginning to sink, cried out, 'Lord, save me!' Immediately Jesus reached out his hand and caught him. 'You of little faith,' he said, 'why did you doubt?' And when they climbed into the boat, the wind died down. Then those who were in the boat worshiped him, saying, 'Truly you are the Son of God.'" -Matthew 14:25-33 Peter began to doubt and sink when he took his eyes off Jesus.  And when he cried out to Jesus in his doubt, Jesus reached out His hand and helped him up--and showed His power in the midst of Peter's doubts and weakness.  


"Therefore, since we are surrounded by such a great cloud of witnesses, let us throw off everything that hinders and the sin that so easily entangles.  And let us run with perseverance the race marked out for us, fixing our eyes on Jesus, the pioneer and perfecter of our faith.  For the joy set before him he endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God.  Consider him who endured such opposition from sinners, so that you will not grow weary and lose heart." -Hebrews 12:1-3
I've learned not to spend so much time worrying about what everyone else believes, but to seek the truth out for myself and not let other people sway me from it. I've learned that I'm not the only one who faces doubts--Eve was first tempted in the Garden when Satan made her doubt God and His word and trustworthiness.  Even the most seemingly invincible Christians doubt, too, and I think it's time that we're all honest and open with each other about our struggles so that we can lift each other up.  
"No temptation has over taken you except what is common to mankind.  And God is faithful; he will not allow you to be tempted beyond what you can bear.  But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you may endure it." -1 Corinthians 10:13 I've learned that sometimes I have to not live based on what I feel and what I'm going through, but rather on what I know, and on God's truth and integrity and wisdom and love. I've learned that when we have questions, we shouldn't push them away.  We should ask for and search for answers in God and His word. I've learned that what God asks of us is actually incredibly simple, even if it can be incredibly hard.  He just says to believe.  Just believe Him.  Just take Him at His word.   "Blessed is she who has believed that the Lord would fulfill his promises to her!" Luke 1:45 It's not that we have to believe blindly--there is plenty of scientific and historical proof to uphold the truth of God's word--but sometimes it's the hardest thing in the world to trust God's goodness and His love when it feels like the world is falling apart on you, when it feels like He's not there.   "Can anything ever separate us from Christ's love?  Does it mean He no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death?  (As the Scriptures say, 'For your sake we are killed every day, we are being slaughtered like sheep.')  No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through Him who loved us." -Romans 8:35-37 But I've also learned that unless you make that choice to say, "God.  I don't understand.  It hurts, and it's hard, but You're worth it, and You know more than I do.  You're bigger than my pain and You're bigger than my doubt, and I know that you work all things together for my good, even if it takes some time, so I'm going to worship You and live and love and obey and believe and trust You right where I am.  You love me too much to let me drown in my struggles and storms." "Give your burdens to the Lord, and He will take care of you.  He will not permit the godly to slip and fall." -Psalms 55:22 I used to be afraid of my doubts.  I used to either live battling them or live in fear of having to battle them once again.  I used to be afraid of God failing me.  But do you remember that song My Lighthouse?  After time after time of listening to it, another verse slapped me in the face once again.   In the silence You won't let go, In the questions Your truth will hold. My God's love will lead me through. You are the peace in my troubled sea, You are the peace in my troubled sea! Do I still face doubts?  Of course.  Every single day.  But I've learned that God's truth is strong.  It will hold up under all my questions and my doubts and my wrestling.  God is bigger than my doubts and my wrestling, stronger than my own mind and heart, and He doesn't shy away from my struggles and doubts.  He loves me too much to let me go down in this.  I've learned to keep seeking Him, even when I don't feel like it, and even when my soul is in turmoil--especially in those times.  I've learned that trials without God will break you, but trials with God will make you, and that the only way we can make it through these storms is to give God the pieces and the hurt and the hardship and tell Him we trust Him with it and need Him to make beauty out of the ashes.  


"'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,' declares the Lord.  'As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts." -Isaiah 55:9


I've learned to say, "God, I trust You, even though it hurts and I don't understand right now.  I still need you."  I've learned to sing "My lighthouse, My lighthouse, shining in the darkness, I will follow You.  My lighthouse, My lighthouse, I will trust the promise; You will carry me safe to shore!" "When you pass through the waters, I will be with you; and when you pass through the rivers, they will not sweep over you. When you walk through the fire, you will not be burned; the flames will not set you ablaze." -Isaiah 43:2 So I hope today that if you find yourself doubting God, or wrestling with something in your life, asking God why....that you'll remember to bring it straight to Him, and that He can and will lead you through it and even make something beautiful out of it if you'll just trust Him and allow Him to do so. "Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance.  Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.  If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you.  But when you ask, you must believe and not doubt, because the one who doubts is like a wave of the sea, blown and tossed by the wind.  That person should not expect to receive anything from the Lord.  Such a person is double-minded and unstable in all they do." -James 1:2-8


"Fight the good fight for the true faith.  Hold tightly to the eternal life to which God has called you, which you have declared so well before so many witnesses." -1 Timothy 6:12


"Blessed is the one who perseveres under trial because, having stood the test, that person will receive the crown of life that the Lord has promised to those who love him." -James 1:12

"And we know that in all things God works of the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." -Romans 8:28
***************************************************************************** God bless you guys and have a great weekend, Joy :)